The best feeling in the world is to love and be loved in return. In every relationship, it is necessary that the man and the woman feel the same way towards each other in order for the love to flourish.
In reality, not all relationships last. There are times when one person might feel out of love. This can lead to a break-up.
Breaking up regardless if it is mutual or by surprise can be heart breaking. If the decision leads to separation, there is no other thing to do than to be strong and firm with the choice.
Why do people break up?
There are too many reasons why a person may feel out of love or simply come up with the decision of break up. The typical reason for most couple nowadays would be the need for space, extra time and other sorts.
If space is required there are other couples who would just want to cool things off. They need some space to figure out some things or to do soul searching.
Others may ask for extra time, this can be considered ‘alone time’. To spend some time alone is also related to the cool things off away from being together.
As for the other sorts, it can be related to third party or change of sexual preference. This is usually in relation to being attracted to the opposite sex or same sex for other cases.
Being attracted to another woman or another man regarded as the third party is the most common reason for a couple to break up. This case often happened for long distance relationships.
LDR or long distance relationship does not always end up with break up caused by third parties. It is because even though those who are always together could also be attracted to others.
There can be another underlying reason for the couple who would break up due to change of sexual preference. It is likely that the man or the woman is already confused with his or her sexuality even before entering in the relationship with the opposite sex.
The process of acceptance
In every break-up, the first and most essential step is to accept. Acceptance can be the most difficult thing to do. One should be ready to accept that the relationship is over.
It is not advisable to hold on or hope that the relationship will still get better. Never stop your life just because you are left with a broken heart. Remember that it is not the end of the world.
Waiting for your ex to knock on your door asking for repentance may no longer happen. This is regardless of how long you have been in the relationship.
Never blame yourself or others
Blaming yourself why the relationship breaks are also not recommended. Keep in mind that it is not always about you. So, never blame what you did or what you failed to do while in the relationship.
Of course, it is also not recommended to blame others especially your ex or his new found love. Always remember that everything happens for a reason.
The reason why the break up happened may lead to a better relationship soon or other opportunities. Just ensure to not lose hope on yourself and what the future will hold for you.
Grieve and vent out
Losing someone after a breakup may also mean losing someone for life. Hence, the process of grieving is included.
Grieving and venting out your feelings is normal. What’s not normal is if you stay of grieving without acceptance. This means that you intend to grieve for as long as you could.
The healing process takes time and grieving is part of it. It can be through reminiscing, watching movies, listening to music and of course talking to a friend or family.
Venting out how you feel to a good listener is the best therapy for an aching heart. With how the world goes today, many people made use of the social media to vent their feelings.
The use of social media to express how you feel especially hate towards another person is definitely not a good idea. You may feel better reading the comments of others agreeing to your hatred but will do no good.
Chances are, you will feel satisfied that others agree with you and tells you that revenge is the best way to relive the agony. At the end of the day, you may feel satisfied but not happy.
The use of social media to spread hatred is no use to ease the pain that you feel. What’s better is to keep things private and simply talk to those who you trust.
A good listener is someone who would tell you that acceptance is the best thing to get through the pain. Time will heal all wounds.
Sad thing is, there are people who grieve too much that they commit suicide. These people lack enough support system to get it through the hard situation.
Suicide is an absurd thing that can happen to someone who has lost his or her spirit because of the break-up.
For anyone with a suicidal attempt, it is best to see or visit a psychiatrist. Getting counseling and getting advice with what you are going through can be a good relief.
Today, there are already several psychiatrists around that are willing to help people who have difficulties accepting the reality of life.
Getting psychological help can also be advantageous to help you cope up with the sorrow and pain you are experiencing.
Move on, move forward
It is not really about moving on. The most proper thing to do is to move forward. There is a brighter future ahead.
Never ever think that life will not be as beautiful or as colorful after a break-up. You must know that there are other people who suffer from worse situations than yours.
Move forward and show the world and your ex that you can still live and live even better without him or her.
Things to do after break up
- Keep yourself busy. You may want to engage doing new things or hobby. Exercise or working out is a good way to move forward. This can help keep you fit and healthy.
- Do things you have not done before. It can be traveling alone, watching a movie alone or bar hopping with friends.
- Reconnect with your relatives and friends. Because you might be too busy with your ex before, you neglect to mingle with them, it is the best time to catch up.
- Transform your look. This does not have to be expensive. It can be a change of hairstyle, new hair color or updating the wardrobe.
- Go on vacation. Being away for a while can keep your mind off away from the memories. It is a great relaxation technique.
- Attend yoga classes. It is a common knowledge that physical activities can make you feel relax. Yoga is one of the effective ways to live stress-free.
It is best to remember that although the heart has been broken, the good thing is, it is still there. You can still use it to continue with your life.
The end of a relationship that was once so complete and blissful is not the end of someone’s existence. Take it as a sign to continue searching for your realm’s worth.
Not all people need t be in a mutual relationship to live. There are others who are bound to live single like how the single parent does.
Single parents already found the satisfaction that they need from their children even without a partner. Hence, it is not always about being in a relationship.
The real essence of our existence is all about loving and being loved in return even not from the partner but from other people around us. These people are those who will not breakup from us like family, siblings, children, and others.
It may not be easy to be happy in a snap, but for sure, you will still find happiness somewhere in your heart in one way or another.